Friday, December 10, 2004

My Wife is Being Mean to Me

Dawn is being mean to me. That's the only way to describe it. And she says it is my cousin Elisabeth's idea. Here's the deal. It's the third day of Hanukkah. We are celebrating it and that includes, although it is not really part of the tradition, gifts each night. I suppose Rachel's really young enough that she wouldn't have noticed if we didn't do gifts, but we feel like it, so we are.

The first night, Dawn gave me a very nice card. And no, that's not when she started being mean, clearly.

The second night, she gave me a very small package. It contained a pair of AAA batteries. Not just ANY batteries, these are clearly from A DEVICE. You know the type. They're not from a name brand. They're not in a package batteries would come in if you bought them from a store. They're not loose, either, though. No, they're wrapped tightly in semi-rigid plastic with a hole down either side. This pair of batteries obviously came directly out of a larger package with other items in it. When we got our Tivo, it had a pair of no-name AA batteries for the remote control wrapped in this same fashon. So, am I getting a small remote? Duane suggested that it might be a small vibrator.

So, then I'm reading the batteries. Dawn wants to know what I'm doing. Well, you gave me batteries. I'm all for giving someone everything they need to make a gift work, but... breaking it up into multiple gifts is... something. It's not as if you gave me a CD and I can read the liner notes, so I'm stuck reading the side of the battery.

Last night (third), I get another very small gift. This one, I can actually identify without opening almost immediately. It's a short 1/8" stereo headphone splitter cable by Belkin. I look at Dawn. "People say you need this," she says.

This is when I become convinced that Dawn is being mean. And she says it's Elisabeth's idea.

But, yes, Dawn... I am enjoying it.

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